At the end of my first year at William Jewell College, I wrote an advice piece for The Hilltop Monitor titled “Things I learned as a first-year.”  Two short, strange years later and I’m finishing my last year at Jewell. Here are some things I’ve learned this year. 

Quit stressing about “the plan” 

Even plans that seem concrete can go awry. My plan was to study at The University of Oxford my junior year and then spend my senior year at Jewell. Then, a global pandemic happened. I, instead, have spent my junior year completing all of my senior coursework in preparation for spending my senior year of college abroad. 

My plan to go to Oxford as a junior felt concrete at the time. However, no plan is permanent. This fact can be stressful, but it can also be liberating. 

If all plans can change, there’s no reason to stress about creating the perfect post-graduation career plan. There’s no reason to feel locked into decisions you’ve made for your life. The majority of decisions are reversible. The next time someone makes you feel insecure for not having life figured out, remember that it is impossible for anyone to have life figured out. Adaptability is a crucial life skill. 

There is no perfect college experience 

Sometimes, I feel like I only got three semesters of a real college experience. This feeling rests on a false assumption that the ideal college experience exists. 

Pandemic or not, every person’s experience at college will be unique to them. It is impossible to replicate someone else’s college experience. Just because you did not have the perfect internship or all in-person classes does not mean you didn’t have a valuable college experience. I learned that my years at Jewell were never going to be exactly what I expected, regardless of the pandemic. The best experiences are unexpected. 

Missed opportunities lead to unexpected ones 

While I was disappointed to not go to Oxford my junior year, missing out on this opportunity allowed me to have so many other wonderful experiences. 

I got to spend another year at Jewell with older friends who would have graduated by the time I came back to the United States. I spent a year playing tennis for Jewell, a chance I never thought I would have. I lived close to home for the first year of my nephew’s life. I took fascinating classes I never would have taken otherwise. 

While it’s easy to focus on the experiences we missed out on, it’s important to remember the experiences we gained. Over quarantine, I took the time to write a poem everyday, one of which got included in a community poem created by NPR. Despite the horrors of the pandemic, looking back I know I’ll never regret the time I spent with my immediate family when I lived at home over quarantine. I may not have been traveling the world, but I still made amazing memories. 

Take the time to enjoy the people around you 

My first year of college, I often confined myself to the silent floor of the Pryor Learning Commons to do homework. I had an excellent work ethic and would say no to hanging out with friends to finish assignments. This year, I refocused my priorities. 

School is important to me, but I’ve learned that relationships are more important. I might work better on the quiet floor of the PLC, but the benefits are not worth missing out on studying with friends. The time we get with the people we care about is limited. Don’t feel guilty for putting off an assignment to have a good conversation with a friend. Life gets its meaning from relationships. 

The effects of affirmation are short-lived

I have always been a good student. I tend to get positive feedback from my teachers and peers. The downside to this is that my self-esteem is a little too reliant on this reinforcement. I know many Jewell students are also achievement-driven.

The problem with being reliant on positive affirmation is that it forces us to set  unachievable standards for ourselves. It is good to want to always better yourself but you can’t base your whole identity on markers of success. College taught me that even after you win an award or get a good grade, you don’t feel any different. The happiness from achieving something wears off quicker each time. 

Instead, it’s important to find confidence internally, rather than externally. Just because others are not validating the work you are doing does not mean it is bad work – and doing good work does not have to be your ultimate goal. Find confidence in your strength, your adaptability and your compassion. 

Intelligence is fake 

My first year of college, I did not believe I was smart enough for a lot of my classes. I felt like I had fooled my professors into giving me good grades – maybe out of pity, maybe just because I was good at faking intelligence. What I was actually experiencing was imposter syndrome, which disproportionately affects women and makes people falsely believe they are not qualified enough for an opportunity. 

In my last year of college, I became convinced that intelligence is not as important as I once thought. I no longer believe that people are significantly smarter or less smart than I am. We all have had different opportunities to learn about different research, ideas and skills. Our brains might process information in a variety of ways, but that does not mean one brain is superior to another. 

College has made me confident that I can learn anything. If you would have told my first-year self that I would be able to take an exam that required me to write ten pages over six texts in four hours without any notes, I would have been shocked. Now, I’ve completed seven of those exams. With the right instruction and enough motivation, you could too. 

If I can drive on I-35, you can do anything 

In my advice column I wrote as a first-year, I mentioned that I was still trying to learn how to drive in downtown Kansas City. I used to add an extra fifteen minutes to my drive home by avoiding I-35 because of one bad experience.  I am happy to say that I now feel confident driving downtown.

While driving downtown may feel insignificant to some people, it was scary for me. There may be things that scare you that other people conquer easily. Don’t let others’ ideas of what is hard and what is easy invalidate your fears – and don’t let your fears stop you from trying new experiences. Do a meditation, say a prayer if you’re the praying type and buckle your seatbelt. No matter what the future has in store, you can handle it. 

Inscape – William Jewell College’s artistic magazine that publishes poetry, fiction, non-fiction and art from Jewell students – released its 2021 edition on April 23, honoring several contributors later that night at the Celebration of Honors.

Four contributing writers and artists received Student Publication Awards this year: Michaela Esau for Inscape Poem of the Year; Jenna Hultgren for Inscape Fiction of the Year; James Hobbs for Inscape Creative Nonfiction of the Year and Kenton Fox-Horst for Inscape Fine Art of the Year. 

Three poems by Esau, junior Oxbridge literature and theory and communications major, were published in the new edition of Inscape: ”The Ninnescah River,” “Paper Crane People” and “Laid Plans.” She emphasized the importance of being in nature and drawing on personal experiences as inspiration for these poems.

“I just love being in nature and I write whatever words that come to mind,” Esau said. “I think it’s easier to write in nature. ‘The Ninnescah River’ was about the time I spent in summer camp and my experience of growing up in church. I think that’s a big part of my life and that was something I reflected on in the poem. ‘Paper Crane People’ is just kind of about how to be a good person. It’s just a combination of different experiences.”

The 2021 issue of Inscape featured many of Jewell’s artistically-inclined students including Esau, Faith Harris, Krista Halstead, Kenton Horst-Fox, Savannah Hawley, Jenna Hultgren, Sequoia Crissman, Erin Gray, James Hobbs, Thom Hennelly and Isabel Warden. 

Although the magazine will not be printed this year, the new issue can be found on Inscape’s website and a physical copy can be purchased for $7.88.

Maddie Wingert, senior non-profit leadership and communication major, will attend the  Washington University School of Law in St. Louis this fall. Alongside an acceptance rate of just 14%, Washington University is ranked 16th in U.S. News’ 2022 list of best law schools. 

Wingert did not decide to go to law school until her junior year at William Jewell College. 

“I’ve always wanted to work with a non-profit and a lot of my internships I had I really liked, but I realized that’s not really the kind of work I want to do with a non-profit,” Wingert said. “I talked with my professors and my parents and I realized that law school was the right path.”  

After law school, Wingert said she plans on going into human rights or public interest law. 

At Jewell, Wingert was a member of the volleyball team, a Pryor fellow and a member of Alpha Gamma Delta sorority. She said these activities helped her become more confident. 

“I’m still shy, but I was really shy in high school and Jewell forced me out of my shell,” Wingert said. “I’ve had a lot of opportunities that I didn’t expect and I think that’s part of the reason that I am going to law school.” 

She said the most difficult part about Jewell has been the Critical Thought and Inquiry courses, which have made her think differently about complex topics. Her favorite course was CTI 240: “Reading the Bible: Then and Now” with Bradley Chance, professor of Core Curriculum. 

While Wingert missed out on experiences due to restrictions from the pandemic, she said the extra free time helped her make the fateful decision to go to law school. Despite the restrictions, however, she said she is satisfied with how Jewell adapted. 

“It’s definitely been different, and it stinks that we missed out on things, but it’s cool to see how Jewell has adapted,” Wingert said. “I still had a lot of in-person classes and we get [to bring] guests for graduation.” 

Wingert said she will miss the people at Jewell, yet she is ultimately looking forward to the change. 

“I am excited to move to St. Louis because I’m from the Kansas City area so I’ve always been around here,” Wingert said. “I’m so excited to see something new and be on my own.”