AFE: My Advice? Enjoy those fire alarms baby, take it all in

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A fire alarm inside the National Air and Space Museum in Washington, D.C. Photo courtesy of DJ Lein.

We all know that one of the best things that happens at William Jewell College is when someone burns a grilled cheese and sets off the fire alarms. Perhaps you’re sitting at your desk working on that paper that’s due in two hours but you somehow managed to forget about until just now, or you were lounging and watching a good Netflix film, but now the ear-splitting screech of the fire alarm cuts through your thirtieth repeat of “Sucker” by the Jonas Brothers.

You roll your eyes and sigh, and wander out into the hallway where your dorm-mates have congregated. It’s almost as if this has happened so many times that you are unfazed by it.

“Who was it?” someone shouts angrily, as everyone whispers and complains about whodunnit, and all you really care about is going back to your bed and curling up in your blankie like a big kid and avoiding your responsibilities.

It’s absolute bliss. The bliss heightens when Campus Safety can’t reach your dorm fast enough to turn off the alarm system and the City of Liberty fire department shows up in full gear with a hatchet prepared to break out helpless young adults that may have suffered at the hands of a smoky microwave with burnt popcorn in it.

Instead of getting mad or irritated, or actually even leaving your room to avoid death by flame or smoke inhalation, I recommend you just enjoy the sounds of blood curdling electronic screams. The alarms are truly a learning moment for everyone. Someone will learn how to actually cook food and you might learn how to just enjoy every little moment – no matter how terrible and annoying it may be. You can learn from the mistakes of others, and they might learn by your endless groans and rolling eyes that they suck at adulting way worse than you do.

So, I recommend cracking open a sweet La Croix, grabbing a mildly healthy snack, cranking up your headphones and letting the alarms rush over you like a soothing wave. Keep on writing that paper or Netflix binging, baby, the little things can’t stop you now.

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